Yes, I’ve finally got my own copy of Demon’s Souls. I’ve missed it since returning my borrowed copy, but now I’ve got my own Black Phantom UK edition. It’s a lovely package, with an art book, CD and strategy guide.

As this is the UK version, though, and I was previously playing the Asian version, the game didn’t pick up my old save file. That turned out to be a good thing, given that I couldn’t remember any of the controls or how to play.

Still, it all came back fairly quickly and it only two me two hours to clear the tutorial and dispatch the first boss. Haven’t played much since then, but I’ve poked away at level 2-1 enough to get to the horrible bastard spider boss. Whereupon I used all my healing items and then died. It’ll be back to 1-1 to pick up some supplies, then. Sigh.

I’m glad my memory wasn’t lying to me about the game, though – it’s just as utterly, relentlessly, punishingly great as I’d remembered.

Last night I mostly played 4-1. I can get to the boss easily enough if I’m careful, but I keep getting over confident and getting myself killed. And when I do get to the boss I die within seconds. I’ve really not worked out how to avoid his attacks and haven’t had long enough to study him.

I ran out of healing items after a while, so I went back and did level 1-1 again. I died so much when I first played, but now it’s very easy indeed. I waded through the whole level with no problems at all, gathering healing items and enough souls to get myself up another level.

And then it was back to 4-1 and many more deaths. I’ll get that Adjudicator boss one day…

I started with world 3-1, thinking it was 2-1, and managed to make things very, very difficult for myself by opening all the cell doors I could find. That was a big mistake, because it let all the prisoners out. No “Congratulations! You freed the prisoners! You found a Big Sword + 2!” here. Instead the emaciated, once-human prisoners just shamble out of the cells and come up to me. They don’t attack (often), they just crowd around me, looking for something I can’t give them. A cure for their terrible state? Death? Well, I can give them that. It feels awful – it feels evil – but there’s nothing else I can do. The prison guards (horrible, octopus-faced monsters) are bad enough when I have room to maneuver, but if there are prisoners in my way then death is not just likely, but inevitable.

After trying that level for a while, I noticed that I’d missed level 2-1, so went back and tried that. It’s much more manageable. An old mine, where death comes quickly to the careless, but that has very few tough enemies inside it. Okay, it took me a good while to learn how best to tackle it and to open some shortcuts, but it never felt too hard. I even managed to kill the boss, thanks to some ingenuity on my part and a very helpful message someone had left on the ground.

I couldn’t face level 3-1 after that, so went to 4-1. The first enemy, a skeleton warrior of some sort, killed me dead the moment I entered. So I went back and got some hits in, back again and killed him. Now those blue skeletons aren’t a problem for me… unless I’m careless. I’ve lost tens of thousands of souls simply through being over-confident in the initial stages of the level. And tens of thousands more simply through carelessness. That’s the thing about Demon’s Souls, after a while enemies become much easier, not because you level up, but because you become better at dealing with them. But even then, if you lose concentration for a second, or take on more than you can handle, then you will die – and die quickly.

After many hours of careful exploration I found my way to the boss. There don’t seem to be any unlocked shortcuts to him, but I found out about an “unofficial” one. By rolling at the right time off a tower you can drop down to an area near the boss. It might be a glitch, but the drop is safe and seems to drop you into an area with no other purpose other than to be a drop zone, so I’m assuming it must be a secret, designed to be uncovered and shared. (I’d heard there was a shortcut on a forum post, but only found where it was exactly because of a message someone had left.

Anyway, I haven’t got past the boss yet. He seems really tough, in that I can’t find anywhere that’s safe from him and can’t work out how to avoid his attacks, but I’m sure once I’ve learned him, he’ll be easy enough. Possibly. I haven’t levelled up in hours – I keep on losing all my souls – but I reckon that being more powerful isn’t what I need to defeat him. I just need to be better.

Yes.

Yes, it is.

I went in with huge expectations, the type of expectations that are virtually never met. I was hoping for a game I could fall in love with and which I wouldn’t want to ever stop playing. And that’s exactly what I got.

I think it helped that, while trying to avoid big spoilers, I’d read up on the controls and got some basic hints from the forums and the English-language wiki. It meant that I was several steps ahead of the tutorial and flinging magic about from the start.

But back to the beginning. I downloaded the patch, which didn’t take long, then was faced with the character creator. I named my character Rev, as always, and chose a Royal as my starting class. This gave me a good magic spell and a magic regeneration ring to start the game with, but left me a bit weak and defenseless up close. I didn’t mess around with the face of my guy too much, just making a nice black man with short white hair. Which is what I often end up with when given the choice. I’m not sure why.

Then into the tutorial. At first, despite my brain knowing the controls, I kept pressing the square button when I wanted to attack, which not only used up valuable healing herbs, but left me open to attack while I ate. I didn’t die, but I took far too much damage. Eventually, though, my brain rewired itself and by the end of the tutorial I was hardly ever pressing the wrong button – and after a few minutes in the game itself I never pressed the wrong button again.

I didn’t explore the Nexus (hub area) much, instead diving straight into the first level. It was glorious. A huge castle, filled with enemies who obviously used to be human… but who don’t seem to be any more. My magic could kill them in one hit, so with care I could avoid taking damage and take them out from a distance. Which should have made the game pretty easy… but it didn’t. I died. A lot. Either an enemy would catch me by surprise, or I’d misjudge the speed with which an enemy was approaching, or I’d get caught between two of them, or… There were a lot of ways to die. Like jumping into a interesting swirling vortex. Shortcut? New area? Nope, death. And falling from stairs. I did that quite a lot, too.

All this despite the help from other players. Help came in three forms last night. Firstly, I could see other players playing the game at the same time as me. They appeared as ghostly white figures and if they ran ahead of me and suddenly started running away or swinging their sword, I knew there was trouble ahead. There were also blood stains on the ground. If I touched those, I got a replay of a player death, which was also helpful. (At the beginning of the game I saw a lot of players running into bonfires and dying. I avoided that death, at least.) And finally players can leave messages on the ground. They’re pre-set messages, so there’s no language barrier there. They warn of impending doom or simply beg for help. (If you rate a message you’ve found, the player who left it recovers some health.) I found several secret areas, rescued a chap who gave me a telescope and avoided some traps because I’d read helpful messages.

Progress was still quite slow, though. If you die, you’re sent back to the beginning of the level and all the enemies respawn. (Any shortcuts you’ve opened are still open, though.) You also lose all the souls you collected from killing monsters. (Souls are a hybrid of currency and experience. You can use them to buy goods, upgrade weapons or – once you’ve got to a certain point in the game – improve your stats.) If you get back to where you died you can recover all your souls, but if you die without finding that spot, you’ve lost them for good.

By the end of the evening I’d unlocked a shortcut through the level and ended the night by being burned to death by a huge, scary dragon. Oh.

That would normally be where this post stops, but I got up an hour early to play some more before work. My broadband was down for some reason, so I had to venture further into the castle without any hints from other players, which was quite scary. I recovered my bloodstain from the dragon – I grabbed the souls, rolled out the way of his fire breath, ran like hell, got caught in the next blast of fire, ran some more, healed up and started to breathe again.

The only way forward was over a bridge. A bridge full of enemies shooting arrows at me… and which the dragon would fly over and shoot fire down. That was very scary, but by picking off the enemies with my magic and running away I got over the bridge.

(I honestly have no idea how I’d have managed to do this level with a melee-only character. I did try melee attacks now and again, but I kept mistiming my parries and having to run away and heal before trying again. At least I had a huge supply of healing herbs. Most I found on dead bodies, but I got several from a vendor in the castle in exchange for my souls. As it’s very easy to lose souls, I had no problem with spending all the ones I could, whenever I could.)

Over the bridge was a lever, which opened the big gate right by the start of the level. I fought my way down some stairs and found myself back outside this gate. I guessed that the first boss would be inside and, indeed, he was. He was called Phalanx and he seemed to be some kind of giant slime beast. I used all the firebombs I’d collected, then fired magic at him until I ran out, then ran around the level for a bit while it recharged, then fired off some more magic and repeated that until he died. I have a feeling that will be the only boss in the game I defeat first time. Just a hunch.

Defeating the boss restored my body to me – it’s a bit complicated, but you play for most of the game as a ghost, with a significantly shorter health bar than when you’re alive – and opened up more of the Nexus. I didn’t have time to explore it, though, because it was time for work. Tonight I’m going to level myself up a bit, maybe upgrade some weapons, then tackle another area of the game. I’ve got a lot to choose from now, I think.

Anyway, that’s what happened, but I haven’t really explained how it all felt to play. In short, it was glorious. The sense of scale is impressive – the castle is huge and feels real, the dragon is as big as dragon should be. The controls, once they click, work very well indeed. And, yes, the game’s hard – very hard – but completely fair. When you die, you want to play again, to recover your souls and get a little bit further. You tell yourself you’ll be more careful, that you’ll be better. And you are. Even without improving your stats and weapons, you’re learning more about the level and getting more skillful. It’s absolutely honed to perfection and feels very much like a roguelike in the way every death spurs you on. I never wanted to stop playing.

I wish I was playing now, in fact. Oh well.