I get it. It is a game for when your wife wants to use your iphone and play with the froggies because it is hella adorable and you can jump around lilypads. DUH.

Might as well jump.

So that’s what we’ve been doing. I’ve been masterminding breeding strategy, moving frogs between habitats, maintaining the catalogue, etc. and my wife has been making the frogs happy and jumping around looking for new frogs to breed with.

And that’s how to make a marriage work, kids!

As such, I found it impossible to concentrate on real games last night, so just ended up playing Pocket Frogs.

It’s a free frog-breeding game and I don’t quite get it.

You have some frogs.

These are my frogs.

You tame the frogs by having them leap around from pad to pad eating flies. (You just click on the pad to jump there. You can’t die, there’s no time limit, you can’t go wrong.)

I am taming this frog.

You can jump on other frogs to breed with them (or breed frogs you own from a menu).

After a while your habitats get full up, so you see some frogs and breed some more.

That seems to be it. Some frogs are rarer than others, some require you to level-up achingly slowly before you can breed with them, you can send frogs to friends and pay real money for unnecessary extras, but, though charming and pretty, it all feels a bit empty.

There are Awards you can earn for performing certain tasks, but most of them are so involved that I won’t be bothering with them, and sometimes someone sends you a request for a certain type of frog they wish to eat or worship, but that doesn’t happen very often – and the chances of having the right frog seems to be slim.

I’m not quite sure what to make of it. It’s perfectly likable, but I just don’t really get it.