Take the gameplay of asteroids, add in a story, upgrades, unlockable levels and all sorts of other stuff and you end up with Space Miner, an iPhone game that many people absolutely love.

I’m not one of them.

Space Miner: Space Ore Bust

Move where I tell you to, you stupid ship!

I’ve played for forty-five minutes now, which is a fair chunk of time, but I still hate the way the ship moves. I’ve tried all the control options, but I just can’t get the hang of moving my ship around. I float and crash and I just can’t go where I want. I’ve even upgraded my ship’s engine, but that just means I fly into asteroids and enemies slightly faster than I did before.

I’ll give it a little more time, but if it’s not clicked after three-quarters of an hour, it’s probably not going to.