It may look modern with stylish comic book graphics and short, sharp cut scenes. It may have global leaderboards.

But don’t be fooled.

This harks back to the brawlers of old.

Remember the days of the Vikings, when boys would be tested on Double Dragon and Final Fight before they could put on their horned hats and sail off with the men to rape and pillage?

This game harks back to those times. It sweeps its way from the snow-covered lands of the north, with pure white backgrounds, sharp black lines and splashes of crimson blood. A game with a snarl on its face, an axe stained with the blood and gore of a thousand men in its hands and a half-eaten leg of roasted pork shoved down its shirt.

Sat by a campfire it beckons you closer, tells you a story of a man waking up in chains, masked men all around. It rises to its feet, invites you to fight. You punch and kick and it seems to fall back under your assault. Then it smiles. A terrible, leering grin lights up its face and its eyes glow with animalistic cunning in the firelight.

“Level two.”

It laughs.

It leaps.

And you’re on the floor. It pulls you back up to your feet, then sends you flying again. You get some blows in, but not enough, never enough.

This game will hurt you, like games used to. It’s not your friend. It’s not interested in whether or not you see all of its story. It’s not a cinematic epic that will adjust the difficulty if you’re struggling. (There are two levels of difficulty, Normal and Hard. Normal is hard. Hard I don’t even want to think about.)

All this game wants to do is be like its heroes, those coin-guzzling arcade machines of long ago. It’s an old-style brawler, nothing less, nothing more.

Expect to be tested.

Cut Him Up!

Surgeons are evil. Explode them with punches.

Oh, yes, overblown, overwritten hyperbole aside, it does have concessions to the modern age. You can choose any unlocked level to start on and you can skip the cut scenes. And, as you can see, it does look very nice indeed.

It’s not perfect. For one thing, it might not be very fair – but if you’re worried about that, this isn’t the game for you. There’s also an odd issue with the joystick graphic sticking sometimes, so it looks like you’re pressing a direction when you’re not. Confusing at first, but a purely cosmetic issue. Just put your thumb back and everything’s fine.

If you’re scared of a bloody nose this isn’t for you, but I’ve been thrilling to the nostalgic feel of the game. It reminds me of days spent hunched over the rubbery Spectrum keyboard and shovelling my last ten pence piece into a cabinet in a seaside arcade.

Maybe it’s not fair. Maybe it’s not elegant. Maybe it really is just the gaming equivalent of a thug dressed in furs. Sometimes that’s enough.