A Gaming Diary
That Rev Chap
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Homepage: http://www.inverty.com
Posts by That Rev Chap
Doodle Jump (iPhone)
Feb 10th
So, that whole “not liking Doodle Jump” thing seems to be over, huh? Commercial breaks, toilet breaks and, er, probably some other breaks I’m forgetting – they’re all Doodle Jump time.
I still don’t like the bits where you have to touch the screen much, but I’m getting better at them and they don’t spoil the experience as I used to think they did.
There's no time to take screens when I'm actually playing.
I always get a bit grumpy when I change my mind about a game, because I don’t like to have been a Mister Wrongface, but on the plus side, it shows the benefits of a gaming diary like this over traditional review sites. People may like numbers and “definitive” verdicts, but games aren’t really like that – especially score attack games without a beginning, middle and end.
On the other hand, there’s not a lot to say about some games, so when I keep playing them I start to struggle for something to say. Which leads to nonsense about cats and getting all meta about the point of this blog.
Orbital (iPhone)
Feb 10th
Orbital is, as I’ve mentioned before, something of a harsh mistress. Mistakes are punished with instant death. Sometimes I’m tempted to feel like I’ve been unlucky, but, of course, luck doesn’t have anything to do with it. The rules are there and the only reason to die is that the human thumb and the human eye simply aren’t capable of judging the angles in sufficient detail.
Buggeration.
The game’s not at fault; it’s just us…
…and sometimes a cat, if it decides to head-butt the iPhone just as you’re taking a shot.
You know, that’s probably how wasps were invented. God was making a nice, friendly insect and just as he pressed the button a cat wandered over and nudged his hand.
Universe creating deities: make cats last.
Flick Kick Field Goal (iPhone)
Feb 10th
Hmpf. This is one of those games where I beat my own high score, feel very proud of myself, then go to check the global leaderboards and cry.
Hooray! I'm great!
I’ve tried all the game modes now and they all offer something different and worthwhile. I think Sudden Death is my favourite – there’s no stopping or starting, just kick after kick after kick. You kick the ball and if you make the kick your score goes up. If you don’t, it resets to zero. There’s no downtime at all.
Treasure Madness (Web)
Feb 9th
Still playing this, when it will let me. I refuse to pay actual, real money to it, so I’m very limited in how much I can play at a time. That’s probably a good thing, though.
Today I got my scuba gear, so I can explore watery squares. I’ve managed to finish off a lot of my maps now, but I’ve got to save up lots of gold to buy snake venom for a couple of the others.
I probably didn't find anything.
I’m also very annoyed with the way they’ve changed the bonus game that pops up after you go up a level in one of the mini games.
All I want is some fruit somewhere...
You always used to get a bonus, now you can quite easily end up with nothing – as I’ve managed to do three times in a row today.
It’s just plain mean, I reckon.
Flick Kick Field Goal (iPhone)
Feb 9th
This was free to celebrate the Super Bowl – hooray for the Saints! – and is one of the best freebies in a while. It’s basically Paper Toss Evolved, or something, where you, well, flick the screen to kick the ball over the field and into the goal. Hence, you know, the name.
Watch out for that wind!
It feels just right, it varies the angle and wind nicely, has a good number of game modes, OpenFeint integration and is very polished indeed. If you missed it for free, bad luck, but I don’t think you’ll regret buying it. A great little quick game – it’s almost worth a spot in the dock.
GT Racing: Motor Academy (iPhone)
Feb 9th
The framerate seems much better in the Career mode than in the quick races I did. I suspect that’s because I was racing against three cars instead of nine, or possibly because the game starts you off with slower cars than are available for quick races. Maybe a little of both. The pop up isn’t any better, mind you.
Montreal, I believe. Looks like everyone's on strike except for us racers.
I’ve found another minor complaint, though. The career races I’ve done so far have all been four laps, which is a little long. Two or three laps would have been a better fit for an iPhone game, I think. The AI cars always seem to be just behind me, too, so I’m a bit concerned that there’s some rubber-banding going on. That’s fine in an arcade racer, but it something a little more simulation-based it seems wrong.
Still, whatever complaints I have got do have to be weighed against the important thing: the cars feel good to drive. That’s what really counts and Gameloft have – somewhat to my surprise, I have to admit – nailed it.
Doodle Jump (iPhone)
Feb 9th
I died for your sins... well, screen shots.
This seems to be my “commercial break” game of the moment. As soon as, for example, Glee went to the ads, Doodle Jump came out. It’s a good thing that I’m not good enough to play for long. Didn’t get a new high score last night, but came close enough to get into my local top ten.
Let’s not mention the times that I got distracted while starting a game and fell to my death with a score of zero, eh?
Words With Friends (iPhone)
Feb 9th
Performance lately has been woeful, with it taking a couple of minutes or so to send turns. It hasn’t stopped me playing, but it’s been very annoying – and given the lack of turns coming in, I’m guessing other people are having problems, too.
Hail the power of the sea cow!
That and the “Performance improvements coming soon” message at the bottom of the screen. That also gave me a clue. I’m up there with Batman as the world’s greatest detective, me.
Bayonetta (360)
Feb 9th
It’s been too long. I’ve not played Bayonetta in a couple of weeks or so, but an hour spent with it last night reminded me of just how good it is.
I went through chapter six from beginning to end. I found huge monsters, protected an annoying child and didn’t have to sit through too many cut scenes. The flow of the combat is just right and even rubbish old me is able to build combos and feel like I’m actually fighting, not just mashing buttons.
I also can’t help be charmed by its silliness. I know some people have commented that they’re embarrassed to play it, because of the sexy cheese filling, but I have no such qualms.
Sexy Cheese Filling
It’s absurdly wonderful and a very, very special game indeed. I’m actually very glad that I can’t afford many console games these days, because there’s less chance of a game being left unplayed and I do want to give Bayonetta the time it deserves. I’ve only put in six hours so far and it’s not nearly enough.
(And, yes, I got another Stone medal at the end of the chapter – I’d managed to miss out one of the verses. Oh, and I died about a million times. Well, six or seven. Something like that.)
Sonic & SEGA All-Stars Racing Demo (360)
Feb 9th
It’s basically Sonic Kart, but with loads of Sega characters, from the iconic to the obscure, and a lovely drifting mechanic.
The framerate is horrible. Not ModNation horrible, but very bad indeed. They’ve said it’s early code and fixed in the final release, though, and I trust them.
I also think they probably should have had it set on the easier difficulty by default, because I didn’t come better than fourth in the five races I played.
Apart from those two points, though, I really, really liked it. It’s colourful, full of characters I either love outright or have a nostalgic affection for and the drifting is lovely. I had a horrible day yesterday – surprise root canal surgery! – and then the sunny Sonic Seganess of the game put a smile right back on my face before bed.
I’m almost certain I’ll buy it at launch after that, if I possibly can.
Still, though, it’s another weapon-based racer, so anyone annoyed with the whole “get hit by an item and go from third to eighth in the final lap” mechanic that all these games feature should probably steer clear. Good thing there’s a demo to help you decide, eh?
