InvertY.com
A Gaming Diary
Texting of the Bread (iPhone)
Sep 29th
Argh! Urgh! Was having great fun with Texting of the Bread last night when a big boss appeared and my phone went vibration crazy. It was horrible. The noise stabbed my brain and I could feel my arms vibrating for several minutes afterwards. Hideous stuff.
Buzz, buzz, buzz, I wonder why he does.
So I went into the options and looked for a way to turn the vibration off. Guess what? I can’t find one. It’s possible I missed it, but there’s no way I’m playing the game again if it’s going to do that every time a boss comes up.
Madden 11 (iPhone)
Sep 29th
At midnight tonight the juggernaut that is FIFA 11 will hit the App Store. I’m not going to be able to get the 360 or PS3 version, but might get this one. One problem, though – it’s 858MB in size. That’s the biggest game I’ve seen on the iPhone by quite some distance. If I’m going to get then I’m going to have to clear some space.
I don’t know what to delete, though. I’ve got some big games on there – e.g. Dodonpachi Resurrection, GTA: Chinatown Wars, Street Fighter IV – but I don’t want to get rid of them. I’ve pared down my music collection far too much already. I’ve long since stopped carrying photos and videos around with me.
One rather large game I do have that I’ve barely played in Madden 11, so I thought about deleting that. That would be less than half the space I need for FIFA, but it’d still be a big chunk.
I thought I better play it before deleting it, though, as I’ve hardly played it since I bought it. (In a sale, luckily. I didn’t pay full price.)
So I started it up and went for a quick game as the Texans against the Titans. (The Texans didn’t quite exist by the time I left Houston, but they had been named before I flew away from the city that had become my home, never to return. That’s a whole different story. Also, remind me to tell you about (T)Ed Miliband and the Sunday Sport some time.)
I miss Texas. Kent's a lovely place, but it's really not the same.
Here’s the thing. Madden 11 is a fantastically slick and exciting game. Sometimes I feel like a spectator, granted, but even then I’m glued to the tiny screen. When the Titans intercepted a pass in the dying minutes of the fourth quarter, stealing my chance to win, it hurt.
So maybe Madden 11 has to stay. Oh! If only I had a 32GB iPhone! Curse me for thinking “I’ll never need more than 16GB, don’t be silly!”
Tough decisions lie ahead. Of course, maybe FIFA 11 will be rubbish. That’d help.
Texting of the Bread (iPhone)
Sep 28th
Typing of the Dead, but with 2D side-on graphics and gingerbread men instead of zombies.
Basically, like.
Your weapon is milk.
Anyway, I’ve only tried Survival mode, which went on for bloody ages longer than I really wanted it to, so I haven’t got much to say. Honestly, I wouldn’t be blogging about it at all yet, but it’s the only game I played yesterday.
Dice Tower (iPhone)
Sep 27th
Build a tower of dice. Hence the name.
Really rather brilliant game where you have to build a tower out of dice. The rules are fairly complex, with trial and error working better at first that trying to read the rules. I’m not even going to try and explain them all, but the basics are that die you place must equal the sum or difference of the dice below.
It’s heavily reliant on luck, obviously, but there’s also a fair amount of strategy involved. I played this an awful lot at the weekend and I recommend it highly for some casual, thoughtful fun.
Splode (iPhone)
Sep 27th
It's a little bit gorgeous.
Free (when I downloaded it) chain reaction game. Think a pastoral, slow paced, rather dull EEEE. Still ate far too much of my time as it appears to be impossible to stop playing once you start.
Lego Batman (360)
Sep 27th
It feels cheap as hell, deathwise, and you’re constantly falling off ledges due to depth perception issues or your partner running to the edge of the screen, coop characters don’t do what they’re meant to unless you coax them just right, there are some infuriating boss battles (Mr Freeze can go fuck himself) and the vehicle handling is appalling. It’s way too hard, yet incredibly easy and it just feels like a deeply weird piece of game design.
And yet it’s brilliant, brilliant fun, in both single-player and when playing it with my wife.
Just like all the other Lego games, then, basically.
Arcania: Gothic 4 Demo (360)
Sep 27th
Things wrong with this game:
1) Same old fantasy setting.
2) Framerate.
3) Voice acting.
4) Text that’s way too small to actually read on my TV.
5) It’s not Oblivion.
Things right with this game:
1) A generous demo that actually gives you a real indication of what the game is like.
2) Controls that make sense immediately.
3) Cut scenes aren’t too long and you’re into the game very quickly.
4) It’s not Two Worlds.
If the text was readable (and I had money) I’d consider this at full price, having enjoyed the demo immensely, but as it is I’ll be looking to buy this after Christmas, I think.
Words With Friends/Pirates (iPhone)
Sep 27th
So, yeah, as well as playing many turns of Words With Friends every day, I’ve also been playing limited-time spin-off Words With Pirates.
It’s very, very silly.
A screenshot will explain all.
Yaarrrrrrgh!
Anyway, if you want to play, you better grab it now – apparently they’ll be turning off the servers before too long.
Minecraft (Mac)
Sep 24th
A long, long time ago on my multiplayer server I wandered off into the middle of nowhere and built a small statue of my wife, just for her.
I wasn’t sure if anyone would ever find it again, as it was so far from civilisation.
Unfortunately, it turns out it wasn’t far enough. Our buildings have spread far and wide and that statue was in the way of someone’s expansion, so they asked whether anyone knew whose it was and if they could demolish it.
Now, I didn’t want my statue to be the way and I didn’t want to be a dick about things, but that statue has sentimental value.
So I came up with a plan. I emptied all the cobblestone and torches out of my inventory and trekked off to the statue.
I then demolished it.
That’s not the end, though! Don’t cry!
I wandered off into the landscape, found an interesting spot far from anywhere and rebuild the statue piece-by-piece, using exactly the same materials as before.
She's back!
So it’s the same statue, made of the same stuff, it’s just moved.
(And I’ve also built a replica in a new secret garden in my castle grounds.)
Oh, and I’m testing out a new texture pack – a custom version of the Painterly Pack.
Heads Will Roll (iPhone)
Sep 24th
Heads do roll.
Fun tilting, drop-through-the-gaps game.
Yeah, that’s not really enough for a blog post is it? One measly sentence, it’s really not enough.
Um, er, oh, here’s a video of my cat playing with bubbles.
Will that do?
