A Gaming Diary
iPhone
Guerrilla Bob (iPhone)
Feb 22nd
Guerilla Bob is a decent, level-based twin-stick shooter. You run from one end of the level to the other, killing everyone in your way.
There are three weapons to choose from, with associated strengths and weakness. The rocket launcher is powerful and has splash damage, but has a slow rate of fire, for example. As you might expect, there are also power-ups to pick up, often just slightly off the main route through the level.
Sometimes it's day, sometimes it's night - just like real life!
The controls are decent, the graphics are nice and it’s certainly not a bad game at all. It isn’t one of the very best iPhone games, but at the sale price of 59p you’re definitely not going to regret buying it. Think of it as Commando without grenades, or something.
Also, though, it gets extra points for using a cigar as your health bar. I like that a lot. Mind you, in the current climate, I’m surprised Apple let that through, the big nannyish idiots.
Noby Noby Boy (iPhone/PS3)
Feb 22nd
Spend some Noby Noby Boy time on both versions over the weekend. The iPhone version had the most play overall, because I’ve always got it in the palm of my hand, but I had a great time with the PS3 version, too. Considering how simple both versions are, it’s amazing how long I can spend just playing with them. No goals, just simple toys.
Sir, we have captured the moon.
In the old days I might have messed around with a Rubik’s Cube, moving it around with no intention of solving it, or played around posing an action figure. Now I’ve got Noby Noby Boy. It certainly makes much more sense to think of both versions that way than to think of them as games.
Swerve Runner (iPhone)
Feb 22nd
In my last blog post about Swerve Runner I said that I’d be unlikely to go back before there was an update. That was Friday morning. On Friday evening, I did go back, and had a good time. On Saturday, there was an update. This update added an “Insanity” mode, which is the same as the regular game, but much, much faster.
I'll be dead in less than a second.
It’s a lot harder, obviously, but it’s not impossible and it’s huge amounts of fun. Okay, yes, sometimes you’re moving so fast that death is unavoidable, but the sheer thrill of travelling so quickly outweighs other concerns. I do believe I laughed with a mixture of disbelief and delight as I played, which is always a good sign.
The update also put a cap on the number of lives you can collect, which makes even the regular speeds more tense. All in all, a very good update to a very good game.
Words With Friends (iPhone)
Feb 22nd
It's a close one.
Thought it was about time I blogged about this again, just to say that I’m still playing it every day, even if I don’t actually mention it very often. Very little of note to report, though I’m having far too many games where I’m not getting any vowels. I’m sure it’s just a result of random chance, but it’s a bit odd. Also: annoying.
Hook Champ (iPhone)
Feb 19th
Well, I found the Minigore levels. As I suspected, I had to buy them from the shop, for the miniscule sum of fifty coins. Not bad at all.
Wipe them out... all of them.
The question is, though, has John Gore translated to Hook Champ well? Well, yes, he has. I’ve only done one his levels so far, but it’s standard Hook Champ stuff, except there are furries running around and you’ve got a gun with infinite ammo in it with which to dispatch them.
I’m still not sure what’s changed since the early days of Hook Champ, but it’s a much less fiddly and frustrating experience than it used to be. Thumbs up!
Noby Noby Boy (iPhone/PS3)
Feb 19th
Given the limitations of the app, I spent an awfully long time messing around with Noby Noby Boy last night. Just flicking BOY around and twisting him around objects, making him wander around photos and using the real-time view through the iPhone’s camera to have him crawl around my house.
Wife, you've got something on your face there.
I also gave the PS3 version a quick go. I visited Jupiter for the first time and had fun in a rainbow tube. Then I just reported my length to GIRL – I wish there was a way to link iPhone and PS3 accounts – and went to bed.
Flick Kick Field Goal (iPhone)
Feb 19th
Just Sudden Death mode, no other game types got a look in. Just kick after kick after kick. It should get old a lot faster than it does. Didn’t beat my own high score, so the frustration was there, but it didn’t get dull.
Fly, my pretty, fly!
Anyway, much as I’d love to write a long, worthwhile entry about the game, it’s just kicking a ball over some goal posts again and again, so there’s not a whole lot to say. I can tell you that it’s an excellent game, but I’m not getting any insights into the nature of gaming or the meaning of life from it.
Swerve Runner (iPhone)
Feb 19th
Didn’t take look to get through all Swerve Runner’s missions on the default difficulty. It’s really rather easy. I was going to go back and go for high scores, but I think I’m done with it for now. It was 59p well-spent – the price of chocolate bar for a couple of hours of high speed, meteor-smashing thrills! – but I think I’ll leave it to lie fallow until an update.
This isn't going to end well...
For a bit of a laugh before I went I put the difficulty up to 100% in the Settings menu. It gets a bit silly at that level, with huge numbers of obstacles, dead ends – and the pop up becomes a real issue. Good for a laugh, but not really very playable in the traditional sense. I must remember to turn it back down again when I do go back.
Noby Noby Boy (iPhone)
Feb 18th
Not a conversion of the PS3 game. Not even a game, actually. Noby Noby Boy on iPhone is a collection of weird mini apps featuring BOY and GIRL.
You can play around with BOY with tilt and touch, stretching him, splitting him, having him grab random objects and listening to a bouncy soundtrack. It may not look like much in screenshots, but something about the animation and the tactile interface makes it come alive as you play. (And that’s “play” as in toy, not game.)
There are hundreds of random objects that appear, maybe more.
Of course, if the included music gets too much, you can summon a robot to play songs from your iPod. Obviously.
He always seems to want to listen to Jacket Hangs by The Blue Aeroplanes.
You can write on BOY and then email pictures to people from within the app. They suggest using it to tell your Boss you’re late for work, though I’m not sure that’s wise.
Just in case you didn't know which web site you were reading.
You can choose a photo from your library and see what the game makes of it. In this case, it put my face on a BOY. Nice.
I had a banana.
You can use Noby Noby Boy as a clock. There seem to be a ton of different analogue clocks included, I’ve no idea how many.
My clock is a mine. Your argument is invalid.
You can use your GPS to find your location and then watch as BOY stretches as you drive to work.
After a ten-minute drive to work I'd stretched BOY a long way and had been driven completely mad by the soundtrack.
You can report your length to GIRL and then, using Facebook connectivity, see who else has been uploading length on the world map.
It's Google Buzz, but it's a bit weird seeing really people pop up like this. Sorry, Charlotte Fabb.
There’s even a built-in web browser.
You can change the preset bookmarks using the Settings app.
And that’s not everything, oh no. (Though it’s most of it, to be fair.) I’ll let you discover the rest… or just blog about it later. It’s all very bizarre, but has an air of madness – and even desperation – about it that I find very appealing. They just seem to have made a little Noby Noby Boy app and then realised it wasn’t nearly enough and so threw every iPhone function they could think of into the mix.
Will I use the web browser instead of Safari? I doubt it very much. Will I use the clock as my bedside clock? Probably not. Will I start Noby Noby Boy instead of the iPod app when I want to listen to music? Well, I’d be surprised if I did.
But will I use those functions when I’m playing about with BOY? Yes, I rather think I will.
Swerve Runner (iPhone)
Feb 18th
Another in my collection of “games I’ve bought because they’re 59p and I’m awake far too early and don’t want to get up.” Sometimes I win, sometimes I lose. Swerve Runner is a qualified run.
You pilot a little hovercraft chap over some randomly-generated, infinite countryside, trying to avoid obstacles and reach beacons. Once you’ve reached all the beacons you can carry on driving around or go on to the next level, which has different obstacles.
It’s all rather impressive. There’s a fair bit of pop up, but it runs very smoothly and seeing huge meteors crash into the ground as you zip by at 200 metres a second is something you should probably experience at least once.
Don't worry about the lake, you can glide over it.
I’d like some meatier physics – the ride’s a bit too smooth for my liking – but the controls are very sensitive while still leaving you in absolute control. There are some instant deaths when a meteor drops on your head without you ever seeing it, but the game is generous enough with extra lives that it’s really not a problem. In fact, it’s probably too easy – but in the Settings menu the default difficulty seems to be set at 30%, so that can be changed.
If you want something that looks similar but is a proper racing game, there’s Ground Effect. If you want something bouncier there’s the wonderful 4×4 Jam. Swerve Runner (and, yes, I do keep wanting to call it Swerve Driver) does its own thing and does it well. Cresting a hill and then zooming through an empty city while meteors rain down is an undeniably atmospheric experience.
It’s 59p right now and it’s not something I’m going to force you to buy, but it’s an impressive and interesting little indie game and one that, I suspect, will be unjustly ignored. I doubt I’ll play it much, but every now and again I’ll remember it with great fondness. (That said, the “quick go” I had this morning after I bought it lasted for over half an hour without me noticing.)
Oh, before I forget, one more thing – there doesn’t seem to be any sound. Doesn’t bother me, but I don’t want you to be shocked by the silence if you pick this up.
